the netherlands Archives

Work Life Balance Not a Myth: Dutch Dads Leading the Way

13 Dec

13 December 2016

Wouldn’t it be amazing if dads could spend one day a week fully in charge of their little ones? It would definitely be a prime example of having the best of both worlds – an opportunity to both be successful in one’s career as well as set time aside for parenthood. An article in the Volkskrant “Half of Young Fathers Spend One Day a Week Taking Care of the Children” highlights the growing popularity of Papadag (Daddy day) in mainstream Dutch culture. Rather than being an alternative lifestyle for a select few, Papadag is becoming more the norm according to the Emancipation Monitor 2016, a biennial survey conducted by the Social and Cultural Planning Office (SCP) and the Central Bureau of Statistics (CBS).

In fact, 50% of the people surveyed believed that a four-day work week was ideal for fathers with fathers. (Incidentally, some Dutch parents take offense with the word Papadag as they feel that the word implies that fathers play more of the role of a babysitter on that given day. What’s more, why aren’t the days mothers take care of their kids called Mamadags? Kids are everyone’s responsibility.)

While most men can’t officially take a full day off during the week, they are able to manage sneaking in an unofficial Papadag with a flexible work schedule and a 36 hour working week that allows them to work more hours the other four days and from home. According to the latest research, 38% of men work from the comfort of their own home one day a week.

My Dutch husband Bram Braakman, a thirty-seven year old entrepreneur and father of two, is one of the dads who happily incorporated Papadag into his life. “I love being able to spend time with my boys. Saturday is usually my day to be in charge of them – from preparing all their meals, to taking them out, diaper and potty duty, etc. Though it’s definitely not typical – most Dutch dads have their Papadag during the week – neither is my line of work.” says Bram. “They look forward to it, and as they get older, especially my four year-old, he understands that it’s the day I give him and his brother my undivided attention. And I also enjoy giving my wife some breathing space to have some time for herself.”

Dutch moms also enjoy the benefits of the part-time work culture in the Netherlands. Many continue working part-time even after all the children have started school full-time or have left the nest. But that’s a whole other discussion.

Parenting is challenging enough wherever you are. However, the Dutch have managed to create an enviable work-life balance. Wouldn’t it be amazing if the rest of world actually caught up with the Papadag trend?

Psst…Want to know more about why Dutch children are the happiest in the world? We wrote an entire book about it. You can pre-order your copy on Amazon.uk.

Getting to Grips with Dutch Grades

23 Nov

23 November 2016

By Michele Hutchison

Of all the things expat parents have to get used to in the Netherlands, coming to terms with the bizarre Dutch grading system is one of the toughest. Especially because of the tendency all of us Anglos have to convert what look like marks out of ten into percentages.

First of all, the two systems don’t align at all, and second, it’s harder to get a basic pass grade in Holland than in the US or UK. Third, it’s actually pretty rare to get the equivalent of an A here. So those of us expat parents who have grown up in a culture of As and A+s are in for a shock. (Incidentally, Dutch kids applying for foreign university places can also suffer from the same mental error when those universities try to convert 6s into Cs, 7s into Bs and 8s into As.)

I’ll try to explain the basics first and if I get this right, you’ll realize that Dutch people famously ‘settling’ for a passing grade (6) isn’t what it looks like at all.

A 6 is a voldoende – satisfactory. Anything lower is an onvoldoende – unsatisfactory (note the term ‘fail’ isn’t used; also, a 5.5 average can also counts as a pass because of a loophole – anything above a half is rounded up to the next full figure at the end of the year). A 7 is good, and an 8 is very good. Anything higher than an eight is still very good, the highest is a ten, but no distinction is made between an 8, 9 or a 10 since getting an 8 already is considered achievement enough.

Now here’s the catch. A 6 isn’t a 6/10. It doesn’t mean your child got 6 questions right and 4 questions wrong. For tests, the teachers usually deduct points (or half-points) for errors from a starting score of 10, rather than adding up questions answered correctly. Emrys, who teaches English HAVO/VWO at a Rotterdam secondary school explains:

“Dutch grading is a complicated thing. Most teachers tell their pupils how many mistakes equals a point off. How many it is depends on the length of the test. Our English department tries to calculate the grade on smaller tests so that a 6 is equal to about 80% correct. On larger tests we usually strive for 70-75% is equal to a six.

When grading essays or letters or other assignments, we usually work with a correction form adding up to a certain amount of points. On a writing assignment I just corrected, the students could earn 14 points. So 14 points was a 10, 13 a 9, 12 a 8 and so on.”

So 80%, an English or American A, could equal a basic pass in the Dutch grading system. If your child is coming home with 6s, he or she is already doing very well indeed by foreign standards! My son has repeatedly told me how strict the marking system is – you should see my face drop when he gets a 5 or a 6 – I should really listen to him.For a bit more information, I talked to a Dutch friend Heidi, who has taught across all the different types of secondary school levels from VMBO to VWO. The first point she made is that there is no national curriculum in the Netherlands and there are no agreements between schools about grading. What they do have is kerndoelen – key objectives which should be taught in the lessons. The same applies to primary and secondary education. Usually there are agreements within a school about standards and norms and how much certain tests count towards a final score. She also explained that different types of tests are differently weighted and the tests where students simply have to reproduce information are marked more stringently than those which require interpretation and application of what they have learned.

N.B. Rina and I wrote The Happiest Kids in the World based on our own experiences of raising our children here. My son’s first couple of months of secondary school are covered in the last chapter, but I didn’t have enough experience to write much about grades (there hadn’t even been any at our primary school).

On Writing, Motherhood and Mentorship

15 Nov

15 November 2016

By Rina Mae Acosta

“Hi, I’m Michele” said this impossibly gorgeous and tall British woman. “I’m Rina.” I replied.

I found myself bracing the frigid February wind to meet my new co-author. And like on any blind date, I was anxious and self-conscious. Just three months beforehand, another random stranger, Marianne Velmans, had emailed me suggesting I write a book. After reading my preliminary book proposal, she asked – ever so delicately – if I would consider working with her former colleague Michele Hutchison.

The story that Marianne had in mind was best written by two mothers – one who could write about pregnancy, babies and toddlers (early motherhood) and another who could write about childhood, schools, and teenagers. I wholeheartedly agreed with her. And so did Michele.

But could we trust Marianne to be the right matchmaker? The chemistry had to be just right.

Michele and I decided to meet in Utrecht – a city conveniently located in the middle of Holland, between her home in Amsterdam and mine in Doorn. I suggested the Japanese restaurant Moto because of my pregnancy cravings for udon and tempura.

I tried my best to come with no expectations and meeting in a public place would give a convenient exit strategy just in case it got awkward. I had a sneaking suspicion that she had similar sentiments too.

But when I saw her, I was already smitten and it seemed as I was saying hello to an old friend I hadn’t seen for a very long time.

I don’t remember much of our first meeting to be honest. But there were two particular instances that I can recall which left a lasting impression.

The first one was her gently letting me know how intense our relationship and contact would be. “You do know that we would regularly have to be in contact with each other,” said Michele.

“Sure, no problem.” I said. I could always use another real life friend. After all, most of my friends were what I called online friends – people who I regularly connected to on Facebook groups and messenger without ever having met in the real world, or who simply live thousands of miles away. My life was conventionally boring, filled with domestic chores, running after my three year-old son and being pregnant.

What I only understood afterwards, well into writing The Happiest Kids in the World was just how intense our communication had to be. We really had to be the best of friends, or it just wouldn’t work. Only after I co-wrote our book could I fully appreciate Michele’s kindness, openness and willingness to work with me. She also became my mentor, teaching me actually how to write a book. I’m ambitious (both by nature and as a product of Tiger parenting) but suffice to say, I had no idea what writing a book actually entailed until I started doing it. And I guarantee you, it is not for the faint of heart to write a nonfiction book filled with interviews and an honest account of a foreign culture.

I also remember just how unexpectedly supportive Marianne and Michele were about me being an aspiring author and a mother. I blurted out, “Before agreeing with working with me, I have to tell you something. I’m pregnant.”

“Oh, I know. Marianne told me,” replied Michele.

I smiled. Marianne also had a similar positive reaction when I told her. “Congratulations! What wonderful news, Rina.”

“You’re still willing to work with me?” I said.

“Of course! Why should your pregnancy prevent you from writing this book?” Marianne said.

Where I come from, it seems that motherhood and writing are incompatible. The creative life – if one wants to take it seriously and do well – is often romanticized as demanding all one’s attention, leaving little room and time for distractions. Motherhood – the all-consuming, martyr mother image that my American culture puts on a pedestal – demands so much energy that supposedly, not much is left over for creative endeavors, or even work at all.

Yet Michele and Marianne knew another secret. That one can reconcile one’s identities as both a mother and a writer. The subject matter, after all, was about parenting the happiest kids in the world. Surely mothers should know a bit about happiness too. And apparently, Michele and Marianne were ready to show me the way.

(Lift Each Other GIF courtesy of illustrator and designer Libby VanderPloeg)

The Netherlands- One of the Best Places to Grow Up as a Girl

12 Oct

12 October 2016

By Rina Mae Acosta

A report released on the International Day of the Girl has declared that the Netherlands is among the best places in the world to grow up as a girl. I’m not surprised. Unfortunately, the United States, my homeland, ranks in dismal thirty-two place, trailing behind Algeria and Kazkhstan. Apparently, if you are a girl and want to grab life by it’s horns, you have better chances in Holland.

The Netherlands ranks fourth place, just behind their Nordic neighbours Sweden, Finland and Norway. The Girls’ Opportunity Index is based on five indicators – rates of child marriage, adolescent fertility, maternal mortality (as an indicator of girls’ access to good-quality healthcare), Women MPs (in relation to male MPs), and lower-secondary school completion. Suffice to say, I am not surprised.

Here are my own musings as to why the Netherlands is an incredible place to grow up as a girl (and be a woman):

Rates of Child Marriage

This serious human rights violation where more than 15 million girls under the age of 18 are married is unheard in Dutch culture. The Dutch actually don’t care about marriage. As an American from a more traditional Catholic Filipino immigrant upbringing, I was surprised to learn that marriage isn’t one of the milestones that girls aspire to. The popularity of American programs like Say Yes to the Dress reveals, after all, the idea that getting married is culmination of female ambitions and dreams. Marriage, from a modern Dutch perspective, is simply not for everyone. And not marrying is not seen as a failure or a reflection of a female’s shortcomings, and definitely no longer a prerequisite for having children.

Adolescent fertility

Contrary to popular belief, it’s not the alluring French that are paragons of comprehensive sexuality education but the pragmatic Dutch. Starting at the age of four, the Dutch begin age-appropriate sex education classes with an emphasis on respecting one’s feelings and others. By the time they are teenagers, Dutch girls (and their male counterparts) have a mature perspective when it comes to their sexuality, establishing boundaries and negotiating terms. They boasts one of the lowest rates of teen pregnancies in the world.

Maternal mortality- Access to Good-Quality Healthcare

According to 2014 Euro Health Consumer Index ranking thirty-seven countries, the Netherlands has the best healthcare in Europe. With their long standing tradition of home births, a well-integrated hospital and midwifery system and at-home postpartum maternity nurses, giving birth in the Netherlands can be an amazing and safe experience. And as we all know that Europe takes health care seriously, being first place speaks volumes about the quality and access that can be found in Holland.

Women MPs

If there is one thing that you will learn about being with the Dutch, it’s that having an opinion is a matter of national importance. Dutch girls are encouraged to speak their minds from the moment they can babble. Being articulate and opinionated is a trait that Dutch girls learn to aspire to – and they definitely hold their ground on the playgrounds and later in the boardrooms and in state affairs. Whether or not the Dutch actually have any idea of the subject matter is a whole other topic.

Lower-Secondary School Completion
The Dutch can proudly boast as ranking third in the world for having the most educated population, just behind Finland and Singapore according to the annual Global Competitiveness Report conducted by the World Economic Forum. And Dutch girls regularly outperform their male counterparts when it comes to high school and higher education.

As of now, I am a mother to two American-Dutch boys and intent on raising them to be men I can be proud of. But if I should ever have a daughter, I’d be celebrating being able to raise her in the Netherlands!

First photo courtesy of Peter Eiking

P.s. Did you know that we wrote a book exploring why all these Dutch children are so happy around us?

American Presidential Election According to an American Expat

29 Sep

29 September 2016

By Rina Mae Acosta

I usually don’t address anything political in my little space on the internet. You visit Finding Dutchland, I assume, to escape from that noise, to be inspired and perhaps nostalgic about all things related to life in quaint and cozy Holland. You come here for the gezelligheid. But I feel the collective anxiety surrounding me as I am flooded by news regarding the American presidential election. The spotlight centers around a lawyer – Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton- and a salesman – Republican front runner Donald Trump.

And I am struggling to set aside all these emotions stirring inside of me. So here I am, trying to steady my quivering voice, to connect and to make a stand.

I am a proud American. And unlike many American expats who happily immigrated to Holland, I dragged my feet, second guessing and suspicious about living in a country I’d never heard of before. Couple that with the downright depressing weather, the bristling direct form of communication, and overall feelings of isolation, the temptation to book a one-way ticket back to San Francisco where I come from, lingered for quite a while. But I came here for love, and decided to stay to start a family.

Almost ten years later, I find myself well integrated in Dutch culture and have seen enough of the merits of Dutch parenting to co-author a book about it. And during the process of writing and research, it wasn’t hard to stumble upon an uncomfortable truth: the on-going struggle for a decent life in America is overwhelmingly much harder than in the rest of the modern developed world, especially compared to Europe.

Their Dutch counterparts enjoy benefits such as paid maternity leave, affordable health insurance, postpartum maternity nurses at home after each delivery, essentially free medical care for children under the age of eighteen, a quarterly kinderbijslag (child benefit) to help cushion all the expenses and a guaranteed minimum of five weeks holiday a year.

And as much as Americans, especially mothers, love to lament about there is no such thing as a work-life balance, Dutch parents are accomplishing it en masse. It’s done through part-time work, where the general trend is both parents dedicating one day a week to childcare, household chores and even penciling in time for themselves.

I also understand the knee-jerk, hot-blooded American reaction to all these generous benefits and supportive social family policies as simply a state of socialism gone mad. My husband and I can empathize – we’re an entrepreneur and freelance writer. If we don’t work, we don’t earn a dime. And we prefer to keep our hard-earned money for ourselves thank you very much.

But America, consider this – the effective tax rate that American workers pay is essentially not that different when you add up all the other taxes – social security, state and local taxes, and real estate taxes. So the American middle class is considerably much more out of pocket and has much less benefits.

So it’s no wonder I couldn’t help but ask why more Americans aren’t revolting? Why is there no civil unrest? Why are Americans, quite frankly, so complacent? Why do we as a society perpetuate the idea that we’re all temporarily embarrassed millionaires?

Now that we’re only five weeks away from the most important American presidential election in modern history, these questions become even more relevant. After all, whoever becomes President of the United States has influence on what type of social policies will be implemented.

To be perfectly honest, I am not infatuated with Hillary Clinton. Like many of my generation – millennials between the ages of eighteen and thirty-four – I have a soft spot for Bernie Sanders. He is the crazy, unkempt uncle at Thanksgiving dinner who would directly acknowledge what had been lingering in our minds – climate change, student debt, and economic uncertainty. We loved him and respected him for it. The Democratic National party and mainstream media obviously didn’t.

In trying to understand why exactly voters lean one way or the other, it finally dawned on me: America is going through a social revolution. It’s not how I romantically pictured it – peaceful demonstrations and inspiring speeches televised live at the Lincoln Memorial. It’s happening behind closed doors in people’s living rooms, in the modern privacy of Facebook groups, and Twitter. It resonates with similar discontentment as the Brexit.

This election if anything is a clear indication that Americans are upset and many have had enough of the status quo. Americans are desperate for change. As T.A. Frank writes in an article in Vanity Fair, “We can see that voters are exceptionally dissatisfied with how things are going in the United States. Nearly two-third of them believe the country is on the wrong track.”

If you’re an American, the best and simplest thing you can do right now is to register to vote. Your voice matters.

With love,

Rina Mae

Why I Love Dutch Children’s Films

20 Sep

20 September 2016

By Michele Hutchison

My nine-year-old daughter used to watch noisy cartoons, progressing from Dora the Explorer to Pokemon and Ben 10, and watching all the Disney and Pixar hits on the way. But about a year ago there was a sea change in her viewing. She discovered serialised Dutch children’s book adaptations such as Koen Kampioen (about a young footballer), De Leeuwenkuil (about a family running a zoo) and Hoe overleef ik (about an adolescent girl). Then she moved on to the wealth of Dutch children’s films shown during the ‘Zappbios’ slot on national tv. For the first time, I started eagerly joining her in front of the telly.

Dutch cinema tends to be realist and naturalistic; films frequently deal with family and friendship issues, tackling loyalty, betrayal, failed ambitions. While this can make for dull and rather monotonous adult films with a lack of dramatic action, Dutch children’s cinema is often outstanding. The young leads act well (by this I mean subtly) and the issues treated work well within the context of childhood, growing up and learning about how the world works. For example, we recently watched the Emmy-award winning lightly comic Rhubarb about a step-brother and sister who try to fix their parents’ failing second marriage. Interestingly, relatively few of the films contain fantasy elements – examples are Dolfje (‘Alfie the Werewolf’ about a boy who becomes a werewolf on his 7th birthday) and Dummie the Mummy (about an Egyptian child mummy that turns up in a Dutch village), but even these also feature regular children in a realist setting.

I have a hunch that Dutch films are easy to relate to because they feature actual children as opposed to fantasy adults or animals. I’m hard-pushed to think of many Hollywood films with human kids in: Home Alone, ET, Back to the Future all hark back to the 80s, and then there are the more recent Roald Dahl adaptations, of course, but still. It’s almost as if superheroes, princesses and animals have to stand in for children most of the time. The sad reason might have something to do with the lack of freedom American children have while growing up. What makes the plots and premises of the Dutch films possible is the fact that Dutch children are free to play outdoors for hours on end in real life. The young characters portrayed in the films move around without parental supervision. They play outdoors, going off on little adventures in the way the Famous Five and Secret Seven did in the Enid Blyton books I read as a child. They have their own (head)space in which the dramatic action can take place. They aren’t followed about by hovering parents.

The other difference is that Dutch parents don’t protect their children from learning about the more challenging aspects of life. They don’t grow up in a rose-coloured bubble, shielded from knowledge of illness, death or sex. Life is not censored. The last Zappbios we watched was actually a German film called Köpfuber (Upside Down). It is about a ten year-old boy losing his joie de vivre as a side effect of ADHD medication. It was hard-hitting rather than a feel-good movie but definitely food for thought. Allowing children to watch Dutch and other European arthouse-style movies prepares them for the real world in a way that no Disney film can.

Here are my daughter’s favourite Dutch films:

Achtste-Groepers Huilen Niet / Cool Kids Don’t Cry

A 12-year-old gets leukemia in the last year of primary school. I think this struck a particular chord because one of my daughter’s close friends was suffering from cancer at the time.

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6LvdPO07b60

Kauwboy / Crow-boy

A boy and a crow and a violent father, it reminds me of the Ken Loach’s Kes.

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x2arjDF3hmo

De Boskampis / The Boskampis

A comedy about a boy who pretends his dorky father is a Mafia boss.

Trailer: https://vimeo.com/120481247

Mees Kees / Class of Fun

A trainee teacher gets put in front of the class. Comedy.

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tRragbB5npg

Het Paard van Sinterklaas / St Nicholas’s Horse

Perennial classic about a young Chinese girl hoping for a gift in her shoe.

Trailer (no subtitles): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_MTdLL08Yds

In Oranje / In Orange

Film about a boy who dreams of playing for the Dutch football team and loses his father to a heart attack.

Trailer (no subtitles): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MXUXi9IkwPo

Het Zakmes / The Pen Knife

Cute 1992 film about a six year-old trying to return a penknife to a friend who has moved away.

No trailer but here is an except: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qPz8cvTYjCw

De Sterkste Man van Nederland / The Strongest Man in Holland

A single mum tells her son that his father was the strongest man in the Netherlands. He goes off in search.

Trailer (no subtitles): https://www.filmtotaal.nl/film/19940

Minoes / The Cat That Came In From The Roof

Film of Annie MG Schmidt’s classic children’s book about a young woman who can turn into a cat

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EO8-iDYffdE

Kruistocht in Spijkerbroek / Crusade in Jeans

Another film of a classic children’s book, a boy goes back to 13th century to set a few things right.

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uc0aM6Wtr_s

The Happiest Kids in the World, Bringing Up Children the Dutch Way

5 Sep

5 September 2016

By Rina Mae Acosta

It’s time to fess up. We’ve been keeping something from you. Nothing bad. We haven’t cheated on you or anything, but we thought it best to wait until everything was official. We’ve written a book and it’s called The Happiest Kids in the World: Bringing up children the Dutch way. The British edition is now available for pre-order on Amazon. Doubleday UK commissioned the book, Dutch rights have been sold to Nijgh & Van Ditmar for publication in the spring, and we have an American publisher too – The Experiment who do cool non-fiction books. They’ll be publishing next spring too.

As expats bringing up our kids here – Rina Mae Acosta is American and Michele Hutchison is British – we realized that something truly wonderful was going on. UNICEF had already confirmed our suspicions: according to the Child Well-Being Studies, the Dutch are raising the happiest children in the world. We’re talking about well-adjusted and healthy kids who rate themselves happy, get on well with their friends and parents and enjoy school. . . And these children have managed to come top the two times the comprehensive study into childhood happiness was conducted.

What exactly are Dutch parents doing differently? Could it really just be all the hagelslag, chocolate sprinkles, that Dutch kids eat for breakfast? Or perhaps it’s because of the chilled-out Dutch babies who sleep through the night and the under ten crowd who are free to play after school because they have no homework. And why isn’t anyone else making a fuss about this? Shouldn’t more parents know about this parenting style that’s actually working?

So we put our heads together to figure out exactly why Dutch children are rated the happiest kids in the world.

In the meantime, come join us on our Facebook page. And if you’d like to support us in letting more people know about our book, please do.

Giethoorn The Fairytale Dutch Village of Your Dreams

9 Aug

9 August 2016

By Rina Mae Acosta

Taking “inburgering” (Dutch cultural integration) to another level, I decided to take my family to a day out in Giethoorn. Apparently, according to Buzzfeed, Giethoorn is one of the most charming places in the world to see before you die. What is it about this obscure Dutch village of only 2,620 inhabitants that has garnered so much international attention? Why is it that around 200,000 Chinese tourists flock to this unassuming, quaint town every year?

And what better way to see and experience Giethoorn than taking a two hour private boat tour with Smit Giethoorn. Plus, I hoped to get some insider information, pseudo journalism style. Our guide Jordy was more than happy to oblige.
So here are some reasons as to why I think Giethoorn is to be considered a place where you can live out your fairytale dreams:

A Village with No Roads

Who wouldn’t want to see a village that essentially has no roads and cars? Rather, the only way to access the village is by the preferred traditional method of boats, or by bicycle. And thanks to “whisper boats” (boats with a noiseless electric engine) reigning supreme on the canals, the peace and tranquility of the Dutch countryside of Giethoorn is maintained.

Traditional Thatched-roof Homes with Perfectly Manicured Gardens

When you have a cluster of traditional thatched-roof homes with perfectly manicured gardens on their own separate islands only reachable by boats and bridges with bike paths, it’s easy to create a once in a lifetime, breathtaking experience. And what can never be replicated, not even by Disney, are the authentic 18th and 19th century Dutch farm houses filled with local families whose roots go way back. Giethoorn is not a museum or an amusement park. it is a thriving,close-knit community which takes pride in preserving its village and sharing it with the rest of the world.

A Nod to Dutch Tradition

Giethoorn was first established around 1230 by a group of fugitives from the Mediterranean. The village evolved when locals discovered a prized treasure: peat, a precursor to coal that can be used as an energy source when dried. The canals and surrounding lakes were actually formed inadvertently as the locals extracted the peat. Hence the canals are only about one meter deep and the surrounding lakes and waterways are not that much deeper. Giethoorn exemplifies the Dutch saying “God made the Earth, but the Dutch made Holland”.

Good Old Fashion Gezelligheid

One can’t really escape describing anything Dutch without referring to gezelligheid, an untranslatable Dutch word that embodies the feelings of wellbeing, coziness, love, belonging, and warmth. Floating through the bucolic village on a boat with your nearest and dearest can make anyone a sentimental fool.

Nostalgia
Giethoorn and the surrounding lake area also brings lots of nostalgia. The well-preserved homes, canals and bridges really do transport you to another time. It’s also a place where generations of Dutch children and teens spend the summer at nearby sailing camps making memories with thirty or so of their newly acquainted BFFs (sailing classmates). And naturally, it’s also the setting of wistful recollections of puppy love, random hookups and romantic happily ever afters.

Enjoying the Chinese Tourists

The Chinese love Giethoorn so much that they are probably the reason why Giethoorn made it to the most recent international edition of Monopoly, alongside glamorous heavyweights Amsterdam, London, Tokyo, Madrid and Lisbon. Their enthusiasm for Giethoorn paparazzi style is infectious. They’ve traveled thousands of miles and across several time zones just to see this unassuming Dutch village (as part of their Euro tour package of course). If that isn’t heartwarming, I don’t know what is. (Brilliant business idea to throw out there: wouldn’t it be amazing if a dim sum restaurant opened up in Giethoorn catering to the enthusiastic tourists?)

Genius Marketing

Dutch villages, towns and cities should take some notes with the brilliant marketing campaigns of Giethoorn. While Giethoorn is definitely unique in regards to having no roads, the country is littered with other villages brimming with picturesque canals, wooden bridges and traditional thatched-roof homes with perfectly manicured gardens. There are other breathtaking places in the Netherlands – the star fortified village of Naarden, for example – that remain off the beaten path or are virtually ignored by tourists.

Added bonus material we learned thanks to our Dutch guide Jordy:

Family Trees

Each house in the village traditionally has a white tree above their front door. The tree symbolizes the family. The size of the tree depends on the size of the family. The Smit family is by far the largest family in the village – their tree is so large that it needs to be against the wall of the house.

Goat Coat of Arms

The coat of arms of Giethoorn are two goat horns. Though there are no longer any goats around, it’s still a nod to how it was way back when. It is also the origin of the name of the village: Geytenhorn (goat horn) became Giethoorn.

Setting of Fanfare

An absolute must-watch Dutch comedy classic (1958) Fanfare by master filmaker Bert Haanstra takes places in old Giethoorn, way before the tourists.

And while you’re at it, come join our Facebook page for more Dutch gezelligheid. Guaranteed to distract you at work and help you procrastinate.

What Disney Can Learn from the Efteling

25 May

25 May 2016

By Rina Mae Acosta

For my son’s fourth birthday celebration, we decided to celebrate it at the Efteling in lieu of a party. We would spend two nights and three days at the Efteling Village Bosrijk, a holiday village that is part of the amusement park. We wanted something memorable, easy, convenient, that required absolutely no planning, or creativity on our parts. (Read = exhausted expat parents).

The Efteling is the Dutch version of Disneyland – a theme park dedicated to classic fairytales, rollercoasters, water rides and other attractions. But in reality, the Efteling is actually the original family-oriented theme park established in 1952. Whispers abound that Walt Disney himself happily took notes and inspiration from the Efteling to create Anaheim’s Disneyland three years later (not true).

Though I haven’t visited any of Disney theme parks with my boys, it’s not hard for me to recollect the memories from my childhood of beloved rides – It’s a Small World, Mad Tea Party, the Matterhorn, and Pirates of the Caribbean. And of course, Disney Grad Night when my entire high school class flew down to Los Angeles to party with thousands of other graduating seniors from 12:00 A.M. till 7:00 A.M. So when I begrudgingly agreed to go (I had an irrational “loyalty” to Disney), I was quite surprised with just how refreshingly magical the Efteling was.

From an American perspective, I’m convinced it’s one of the best kept secrets of the Netherlands (What American has actually heard of the Efteling?). I’m actually so enamoured with my Efteling experience that I wished Disneyland would take some notes from this Dutch staple. In particular, these are the things that Disneyland can learn from the Efteling:

It’s gezellig (Old-fashion charm)

To appreciate the old-fashioned charm of the Efteling, you need to learn about the Dutch concept of gezelligheid. It’s pronounced with a guttural g as if you’re clearing your throat: heh-zel-ick-hide. Gezelligheid is an untranslatable word that encompasses the feelings of warmth, love, coziness, and belonging. Imagine drinking a cup of hot chocolate milk by the fireside when it’s freezing outside, or waking up to homemade pancakes for Sunday brunch. The Efteling feels like it’s straight out of a Normal Rockwell painting – good old-fashioned charm and nostalgia centered around family values and children. It not only looks old-fashioned (circa 1950s time warp), but it also feels as if time stood still. It’s essentially a beautifully manicured garden with thousands of flowers, with every single detail meant to make you feel at home right away.

Unadulterated Fairytales

At the heart of the Efteling is the Fairy Tale Forest, a 12-acre maze of interactive, beautifully designed dioramas designed by illustrator and painter Anton Pieck and engineered by film director Peter Reijnders. The twenty-five dioramas are based on unadulterated fairy tales from the Grimm brothers, Hans Christian Anderson and Charles Perrault. Think of it as what you get if Tim Burton and Pixar Animation Studios collaborated together and created something refreshingly authentic based on tales of yore. I loved seeing old-school fairy tales come to life through the eyes of my toddler – Little Red Riding Hood, Pinocchio, Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, Fairies, The Emperor’s New Clothes, etc. (And it worked – he’s now really into being read fairytales before bed).

Affordability

Efteling tickets are quite affordable – starting at € 35 for a day pass, not at $100 like some other places. And knowing the Dutch love affair of a good bargain, there are often discounts available at local grocery stores at certain times a year and online. It’s wonderful how the Efteling theme park is generally accessible to the middle-class without the fear of going broke. An added bonus: not only are you allowed to bring your own food and drinks, but there are plenty of picnic tables and benches scattered around to enjoy.

A Considerably Less Commercial Experience

It’s quite a relief that the Efteling is a considerably much less commercial experience – not an endless landmine of temptation, heartache, disappointments, and negotiating with exhausted and overstimulated children. I could only recall two gift shops – one at the entrance and one midway – selling reasonably priced souvenirs, and tastefully incorporated within the backdrop. The focus is on the experience and memories made at the Efteling, not the illusion of purchasing “happiness” though prohibitively expensive movie-tie-in paraphernalia.

BONUS Holle Bolle Gijs – A Talking Bin

Holle Bolle Gijs is a talking trash bin that yells out “Papier hier, papier hier ” (paper here, paper here) over and over again to the amusement and pure joy of toddlers and adults alike. When something is placed in the bin, Holle Bolle Gijs says Thank-you in different languages, or “Dat’s lekker” (that’s delicious). No wonder the Efteling is incredibly immaculate – they’ve ingeniously “tricked” all the little children to collect rubbish to place in Holle Bolle Gijs mouth. Suffice to say, our four year old spent considerable time making sure that Holle Bolle Gijs was well-fed.

How To Succeed In Your 30s

18 Jun

18 June 2015

By Rina Mae Acosta

I’m now well into my thirties where motherhood and finding my calling take center stage. Being 31 weeks pregnant with baby number two and having a career opportunity help solidify those feelings. Since I’m riding high on pregnancy hormones, it’s the perfect opportunity to wax poetic about how to succeed in life in your 30s. And when I mean “succeed”, what I am actually referring to is how to acquire the overachiever’s ultimate, ever-so-elusive trophy – genuine happiness.

What do I know about happiness? The self-deprecating, overly apologetic and polite Asian-American in me is tempted to write : not a lot really. Yet if I am truly honest with myself and my readers, I have to admit that overall, my life is pretty wonderful mainly because I’ve decided to go Dutch. (Though please don’t confuse my behind-the-scenes life as equating to perfect because I too have a whole laundry list of first world problems.)

Spending my 30s in the Netherlands -the world’s epicenter for happy babies, kids, and adults – is quite helpful and even inspiring. Living in close proximity to Utrecht, one of the happiest places in the world, reinforces the overall message of happiness. It seems that simply being Dutch is an almost universal guarantee for being happy. With their trademark blend of refreshing directness, liberal attitudes and keen sense of fairness, the Dutch seem to know a lot about living a life well-lived.

I still have a lot to learn from these beautiful (and sometimes intimidating) giants that tower over me. I am also convinced that it’s when you’ve outgrown the narcissistic 20s and you find yourself on the landing on the stairs, that you are more open to this alternative lifestyle free from the status quo. So for now, here are some things from Dutch culture that get to the very heart of accomplishing happiness in your 30s (and for the rest of your life):

Live within your means.

It’s actually quite refreshing to live in a culture where being thrifty is admired and encouraged. Life in the Netherlands, like the United States, can actually be prohibitively expensive. The struggle is real folks. Thankfully, keeping up with the Joneses mentality doesn’t exist here and is frowned upon. People in the Netherlands work to live, not live to work, mastering the fine art of life and work balance.

Don’t ever apologize for who you are.

Be honest with who you are and trust your intuition. Accept the reality that not everyone will like you when you follow your heart and your guts. Life isn’t about winning a popularity contest. Just dust the dirt of your shoulders when it comes to trolls and mean girls.

Say what you mean and mean what you say.

Though it definitely takes some time getting used to, Dutch directness can do wonders for your mental health. The Dutch have no qualms saying what is on their minds and letting you know about it. There’s no second guessing, no trying to figure out nuances, no anxiety. It’s clear from the start. And you’re equally expected to speak your mind. Be brave and let the words come out.

Always err on the side of kindness.

Despite the notorious reputation of the Dutch being cheapskates, they’re actually among the most generous when it comes to giving aid according to the World Giving Index. They may not have much but they are more than willing to share what they do have, whether it’s time, money or expertise. This generosity is reflected in everyday life. There’s a sense of social responsibility in Dutch neighborhoods to keep an eye out for each other. Don’t be fooled by their initial distant demeanor – underneath their stoic personas lies a kind person more than happy to help and give without hesitation.

Friends and family are everything.

Contrary to the infamous reputation of Amsterdam’s liberal policies for sex, drugs and alcohol, friends and family are everything to the Dutch. Daily family meals and regular get-togethers with their nearest and dearest are a must. By nurturing the ties that bind, one fosters their sense of belonging.

Enjoy the company that you keep when no one is around.

Master the art of “dating” yourself by investing time (and money) in your own interests and passions. While family and friends are of utmost importance to the Dutch, they are also fiercely independent and embrace personal-development. They even have a special calendar to ensure that they pencil in “me time”. This is especially important for moms in the thick of parenting in the early years to remember.

Celebrate every single birthday.

Since we never know when the proverbial shoe will drop, celebrating every single birthday with our nearest and dearest is an absolute must. A simple cake with candles and refreshments surrounded by lots of love, laughter and gezelligheid will suffice. For the Dutch, each birthday is an important accomplishment accompanied by greeting the birthday celebrant with “Gefeliciteerd” (literally translated as “Congratulations”). I always like to add in, “for living another year.” Everything else – fancy dinners, extravagant gifts, and decorations – is superfluous.

Eat less, exercise more.

The simple mantra “eat less, exercise more” as part of your daily reality can help you live a long and healthy life. The Dutch incorporate regular exercise, usually in the form of biking, as simply being part of what they do nearly every day. And of course, given their pragmatic and traditional view on food, they always eat meals in moderation.

Travel.

Where ever you are in the world, chances are you are going to run into a Dutch person. The Dutch love to challenge themselves in learning about new cultures and how other people live. Consider visiting one new place each year. Not only will time away do wonders for your psyche, but will give you a new perspective on what it means to really live and some time to reflect on whether or not you’re living the life you want.

And don’t forget to turn your face towards the sun.

The perpetual grey skies in the Netherlands make every day that the sun shines a remarkable, special day. It really is about celebrating and finding joy in the everyday moments of life, the quiet moments of getting up and being grateful that you have another day to live. Just remember not to forget the sunscreen.

(First photo courtesy of Peter Eijking. Visit his website for more inspirational images and videos of the Netherlands).